Fixing Your Relationship:
Why am I not Getting What I Desire?
Making The Wrong Decision
Filtering Relationship Issues
“There are many reasons why lovers are afraid to connect at a deeper level. Insecurity can make them afraid that their partners will love them less if they know too much. Perhaps, when they’ve tried in the past, they have had bad experiences and felt rejection, abandonment, or invalidation” – psychologytoday
- Number Of Dates: The number of relationships we have engaged ourselves in could automatically determine where exactly the fault is actually coming from. Because moving from one relationship to another show that we may not be serious about the relationship we are into. But if that is not the case then let’s ask ourselves the next question, What Brings Up Issues?
- What Brings Up Issues: What are the things that brings up issues? Knowing the things that brings up issues or arguments in a relationship could help determine the reason why a relationship is not working. Are the things that brings up issues about money, time, communication, long distance or some other factors. If we can define or clarify what brings up issues in our relationships it becomes easier to fix them. Understanding and patience pays off in shielding a relationship, we must learn to understand our partners and also be patience, without this, there will always be issues.
- Handling Issues: How do you handle Issues? When there are issues or misunderstanding in a relationship how do you handle it? Do you shout or scream at your partner so that he or she may know that you also have the right to speak? Or you make them speak up their mind before interfering. Are you the type that feels reluctant to say please or say I am sorry? A man or a woman who does not respect his or her partner gives room to problem in a relationship and it may never be fixed until it eventually ends up in breakup.
- Who Is Always At Fault: Do you always feel or think your partner is always at fault, as you always find no fault in yourself, or you do not see yourself doing anything wrong for the period of time the relationship has being in existence. If this is so, then you are getting it all wrong because there is no human that will never make mistakes or do wrong, since we are imperfect as human we are bound to make errors and mistakes. So we should be opened to second thought, a person can never be wrong all the time, there must be some truth and right in what a man does, before you judge your spouse take your time to look deep into the situation before you conclude or make a final decision or action.
- Who Do You Shift Blames On: Shifting blames on our partner is a sign that shows that we are not really capable enough to take responsibilities and a man in a relationship that is not really ready to take blames can not take any other responsibilities effectively. This also applies to the women in relationships too because both the male and female has a great responsibilities to carry.
- Who Do You Confide In: Who do you tell about your relationship and what answers do you get? Is it the answer that favours you all the time or perhaps the answer didn’t favour you but you did things in your own way? Confiding in people who knows nothing about your relationship could harm your relationship because it is not everybody that we come across that loves us or wants to see us succeed especially when it comes to our relationships. It is not healthy to confide in just anybody. Confiding in people is dangerous but that doesn’t mean that we should not confide in people at all. When confiding in people make sure you are confiding in people who have good relationships or meet with a relationship counselor.
- Who Initiated The Break Up: Have you been the one initiating all the breakups? If so, ask yourself the reason why you end all of the relationships. Is it that you are tired of a recurring problem, and that exact problem kept on surfacing on every other relationship you have again had, if so, then you need to fix why your relationships are not working yourself by having a lot of patience and tolerance to understand your partner and the relationship in general.